Friday, March 20, 2009

Out-alphaing

Yesterday I explained why many loving, caring relationship-oriented men feel like they are unable to really "give it to" their woman.

It is because they can't.

But what about the few alpha males (or those willing to put in the work to get there)?

Is it a problem of betas only that the women they sleep with (if they get there) crave strange cock? Do you need to become an alpha to "enjoy marriage" without fear of losing the woman's affection, getting cuckolded, left for good?

Study carefully the graph (Fig. 4.2) on the bottom of this page of a textbook on "Primate Sexuality". It simply plots the number of copulations over a certain time range against the rank of the male animal (alpha being 1). I call it the "Number of lays as a function of status" plot. The point here is that you find the same basic trends in monkeys and apes (and I predict: humans):

You can see there is a steep curve going from zero for almost all males to hundreds per month for a handful of "lucky males". No big news. It is common knowledge and scientifically proven that there are a few (say 20%) men who get to sleep with most (say 80%) of the girls.

But - what is to point out that the common alpha vs. beta dichotomy is oversimplifying the fact that there is actually a continuum between these ranks.

And that means that unless you are the absolute number one, there are always males around you who are more attractive (i.e. able and probably willing to snitch your woman). More than that, even if you the guy is lower in rank, he is still fuck-worthy to the (primate) female mind:
"Paternity studies often reveal that reproductive outcome does not always correlate with male dominance rank"

Add to this the loss of rank by mere commitment to a woman, and the fact that rank is not set into stone, but dynamic and you pretty much end up with the complete impossibility of becoming the exclusive object of her desire.

In other words, you can be freaking Justin Timberlake, and you still will end up banging pussy that had just been filled with another guy's creampie.

Don't cry, beta boys. Your fate is the fate of any man (who give up their alpha status and the harem-holding privilege that comes with it).


(Awww, medieval-style romance! A courteous man and cute dogs in the background... wait, wtf?)

11 comments:

  1. Dropping out of the "relationship market" seems the best option for any man, beta or not. See today's post.

    If you mean that men should just simply go for "pump and dump", as we all know, that's a viable option only for alpha males, not betas. No beta male has the ability to attract a woman in such a fashion.

    If you mean that beta males should just give up on sex with women, let the alphas win, and turn to porn or prostitutes, then yes, that is a perfectly valid option.

    And that means that unless you are the absolute number one, there are always males around you who are more attractive

    The problem is that for your average beta male, he is so far down the scale that it's pointless to even bother competing. The problem isn't that another guy had sex with her. The problem is that she's only willing to date you because she can't do any better anymore. The problem is that as a beta, no woman is less crippling to me emotionally than a woman who may enjoy me as a friend, but only fucks me to keep me around to prevent her own slide into loneliness and depression.

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  2. Don't cry, beta boys. Your fate is the fate of any man (who give up their alpha status and the harem-holding privilege that comes with it).

    Remember, alphas can leave a relationship and find another woman easily. Betas have no ability to do that.

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  3. I don't buy this. I think John Mullany (Peter Gallagher) had it right in explaining to Graham Dalton (James Spader) in "Sex, Lies, and Videotape" how being married actually gave him MORE access to cheat.

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  4. sestamibi - you are right. Marriage gives you more access to cheat. If you own a harem, and the women know it, you do not cheat. ;-)

    No doubt, a wedding band can get you laid.

    But the freedom of having your own apartment, and nobody waiting for you after work outweighs that benefit, especially if your game is tight

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  5. DA:
    If you mean that beta males should just give up on sex with women, let the alphas win, and turn to porn or prostitutes, then yes, that is a perfectly valid option.
    ... or learn game. It is not that hard. And it is no more "manipulative" or a "strategy" than the beta whining and supplication. I doubt that we are born alphas and betas, and no one can change that. There is a disposition, for sure, but all genetic traits get into effect via interaction with the environment.

    The problem is that she's only willing to date you because she can't do any better anymore.
    As I outlined in the post, that is what we all do. We are only willing to date the best option available. It is a market. Best bid meets best offer. Seeing things a little less romantic helps.

    alphas can leave a relationship and find another woman easily. Betas have no ability to do that.
    That was kind of the point of my post. There is a continuum between alpha and beta (to omega). Your statement might be true for omegas, but most betas I know can attract women. Granted, it takes them quite a bit of time and effort (since women do not accept "pump'n'dump from these guys, they get tested hardcore for commitment), but they do get girls.

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  6. It is common knowledge and scientifically proven that there are a few (say 20%) men who get to sleep with most (say 80%) of the girls.

    In the scientific studies I read it is not like that but more like "20% men get to share 80% of the sexual interactions". From this I deduct not 80% girls are sleeping with 20%, but rather 100% of women are sleeping with the 20% of men, 80% out of the times they have sex.

    Means, a woman who has had only 5 partners, likely will have had 4 of them in the 20% category.

    good or bad?

    It is just that, she sexed the one who least needed it (not necessarily least wanted), and more likely the one who put least value on her.

    If there is any significance, I dont know, but knowing that any girl has been shared by a few of the men is disheartening, even though I have been one of those, and sometimes am, when in mood.

    Add to this the loss of rank by mere commitment to a woman, and the fact that rank is not set into stone, but dynamic and you pretty much end up with the complete impossibility of becoming the exclusive object of her desire.

    This is what I observed, in literary writings, in studies, in my life, that you automatically lose rank with a woman as soon as you commit. The only way to keep the rank somewhat in its original state is to let her know you can leave anyday, you will have side flings. (not can, but will)

    Upon commitment, you are trapped, in the older society, and especially now. She knows it. and anyway, what kind of high rank do you have if you even commit to her? None of the alpha's in the past did...

    The wedding cake analogy is exact, because the wedding cake by itself states that you are of lower rank, independent of your previous rank.

    A man needs to make it clear that she is not the only sexual outlet, and that he chooses her everyday, and there is no guarantee that he will do it tomorrow.

    In this context, once the kids arrive, the man is fecked.

    Some say we are dealing with women's nature etc, and that it is normal...

    I say, I judge it.

    I say it is sick.

    estamibi said...

    I don't buy this. I think John Mullany (Peter Gallagher) had it right in explaining to Graham Dalton (James Spader) in "Sex, Lies, and Videotape" how being married actually gave him MORE access to cheat.


    Once again, my claim of things being sick.

    This man had more access to cheat, not because his incentives changed, or his value changed.

    It was because he was married, he had his preselection value through the roof.

    He was already attractive to women by the fact he was wanted by another.

    Possibly his rank among the eyes of the outsider women was way higher that in the eyes of his wife; I can claim he got sexed easier by the women he cheated with than by his wife.

    And having better access to cheats, really does not affect the chances of your wife making you raise some other dudes kid, or you bareback riding her with a few other guys' cum already fighting inside her pie.

    (contradicts what I said earlier about letting her know, but there are few details which affect this: Access to cheat is between the guy and the other women. If wife does not know about this it will not affect the mans rank, thus will not affect her cheating possibility)

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  7. z.g. wrote
    In the scientific studies I read it is not like that but more like "20% men get to share 80% of the sexual interactions". From this I deduct not 80% girls are sleeping with 20%, but rather 100% of women are sleeping with the 20% of men, 80% out of the times they have sex...
    I think you are right. Data on this is hard to get, but I wouldn't be surprised if it came out like that (it is for other primates - see the book that I link to in the post).

    There is a huge skew in the male distribution (see: Figure 1 (right hand side) of peer-reviewed data analysis here). Some men have insane amounts of partners (four digits!). Different partners that is, you just need to do the math to see that they fucked a large part of the population - and that is without taking the tripple digit guys into account!

    It is just that, she sexed the one who least needed it (not necessarily least wanted), and more likely the one who put least value on her.
    This is the very basis of female sexuality. "Women want the unattainable". Hence it is best if you remain unattainable.

    And having better access to cheats, really does not affect the chances of your wife making you raise some other dudes kid, or you bareback riding her with a few other guys' cum already fighting inside her pie.
    (contradicts what I said earlier about letting her know, but there are few details which affect this: Access to cheat is between the guy and the other women. If wife does not know about this it will not affect the mans rank, thus will not affect her cheating possibility)

    Couldn't have said it any better.
    Sadly, most "higher beta" marriages I know are like that. De facto open marriages without the guy or girl realizing what is going on. They are clowns to anyone else who see through their sham.

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  8. 11-minutes, you are a penis licking, bear humping, but scratching, shit sniffing, cum snorting, retarded monkey. I am better than you.
    'Nuff said.

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  9. I've read twenty of the blog entries so far and each has been more (disturbingly) enlightening than the last. Each is a well reasoned argument with merit, experience, and wisdom behind it. Nothing in biology makes sense unless applied to evolution, so than you for making that an easier pill to swallow. Keep up the good work and I look forward to reading all of your entries!

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    right away...

    (VIDEO) Get your ex CRAWLING back to you...?

    ReplyDelete
  11. If you'd like an alternative to casually picking up girls and trying to find out the right thing to do...

    If you'd prefer to have women hit on YOU, instead of spending your nights prowling around in crowded pubs and restaurants...

    Then I encourage you to view this eye-opening video to find out a weird little secret that might get you your own harem of beautiful women:

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    ReplyDelete