Tuesday, August 11, 2009


I spent past week away from any aesthetically displeasing experiences by traveling Japan. And although this wasn't my first time to explore the land of the bizarre, I couldn't help but stay in awe given all the things happening around me.

Any Westerner experiences the same strange and foreign feeling when spending some time in Tokyo. There is the "other-race effect" that distorts our visual impressions. There is the unique experience of walking through a colorful world filled with flashing signs and teasing advertisements - none of which speak to you (unless literate in Japanese). There are the manifold customs and gestures you are not initiated to. People sleeping on trains, on pavements and in Pachinko halls because they missed the last train. Food made from horses, whales and other animals you never though of as edible. Restrooms that squirt water up your butt. It's a never ending sequence of new impressions that paralyzes your mind with estrangement - even if you have been to this place many times before.

Yet, beneath the confusing surface of cultural differences loom the same simple biological rules that guide all human behavior.

Non-surprisingly, then, even the strangest seeming aspects of Japanese culture seem to be rooted one way or another in the familiar terrain of human sexuality.

Japanese culture is focused on self-restraint. All the politeness and nice little gestures that make every day life there so agreeable come with the flip side of people underlying strong social constraints and norms. And that societal control extends deep into private lives: You can't make out on streets in Japan. In fact, lovers will not even hold hands. Porn, although abundant, gets censored by digitally distorting the genitals. And sex shops seem to sell more comic books and plastic figurines than actual sex toys.

And just like Britons became hyper-sexualized during the restrictive norms of the Victorian age, so do other cultures find their own little pressure valves to, ahem, blow off some steam. And the more pressure there is, the more impressive the pressure relief.

Fetishes are abundant. For many men, real women get replaced by 2D stimuli. Accordingly, girls turn into Goth-Lolitas to match the altered preference. There are stores for used underwear and even school girl saliva.

But the most fascinating development are the male hosts:

"Male hosts pour drinks and will often flirt with their clients...; hosts may have a variety of entertainment skills, be it simple magic tricks or loads of charisma with which to tell a story... Pay is usually determined by commission on drink sales..., with tens of thousands of dollars sometimes offered to the host who can achieve the highest sales."

In other words, guys who make shit loads of money by running Game on women.

All of that has been captured in fascinating detail in Jake Clennell's documentary "The Great Happiness Space" (I highly recommend clicking the link and taking the time to watch; there is much to learn here). And once you get an eye for it, you can see these men at work (basically running Day Game) all over Tokyo. This is not a fringe phenomenon. This is a huge industry.

The reason this works are obvious. The strong forces of biology deep inside the (subconscious) female mind are easily exploited: once a woman thinks she found a man with sky-high social status, she will not only be happy to drop her pants but set her life (or at least a large part of her income) on it to get the guy. Pick up artists, macks, pimps and hosts all profit from that fact alike. Yet, while pimping and prostitution are still stigmatized, there are no social rules in place (yet) that could help women to steer around guys who use their knowledge of female sexuality to exploit the female population.

There is another aspect that is interesting about the male host bars in Japan.

And that is the "Decline of the Western Male" as bemoaned by many.

In short, it is not only women getting fatter and increasingly masculine to the degree of gender neutrality that plagues our society. Men play their part, too. As women take on increasing amounts of masculine traits (including relentless promiscuity at the expense of stable family units), there are more and more men who take on feminine clothing, mannerisms and lines of thinking.

But if you thought that this has anything to do with a Decline of the West, you are mistaken.

Japanese men have taken a similar route. And hosts are a prime example of that.

It is interesting to note that it is PUAs, Pimps and Hosts that seem to benefit the most from their feminized exteriors. They either are the tip of the spear (of a truly gender-reversed society), and signal in which direction we are marching or they still benefit from the appeal of the Dandy and bad-boyish Misfits.

Either way, unbelievably, these are (some of) our modern day alpha males:


  1. I just can't wrap my mind around the idea of a bidet. Sick.

    The Japanese are astoundingly fetishistic. It really is almost like a fantasy or comic book.

    I think when the fashions tend toward effeminate demeanors in men, the alpha male benefits, because only he has sufficient male energy/charisma to not look like a flaming gay. It's dandy vs. mangina. If you are on the other end of the spectrum emphasizing it with effeminate dress would merely make you look like a woman. It is a testament to one's manhood that he can peacock or dress to the nines without seeming a ponce.

  2. i refuse to comply. i will continue going around with stubble, my slightly scarred face, and mocking the shit tests of would be female detractors.

  3. I like dan deacon who is shown in the "America after" picture. He is a party live. Oddly, the lead singer of "les savay fav" looks a lot like him and his band is a party live too. There seems to be a niche for falstaffian rock band singers now.

  4. Wow they (hosts) are not alpha males.. you are highly mistaken. The alpha males in Japan are Yakuza, athletes, politicians and the high positioned business men. Guys who work as hosts are young, dumb and can only make money off their looks.

    Strippers, female hosts and models will try to bag celebrities, Yakuzas and high level business men. The goal of most female hosts is to find a suitable businessman and marry them.

    Japanese girls really let loose with a "gaijin" since they won't feel guilty afterwards. They will avoid marrying one because their parents are against it. You are right on the money with most Japs being feminized! Their fashion sense and body language are really gay. People think I'm a caveman when I walk around Tokyo... even with a suit on. Maybe they think I'm a Yakuza cuz of the shades.

  5. One of the guys at RSD is actually a gaijin who got a job as a host. His username is "Oh!Saka" or something like that. I love Japan as a visitor but I'd hate to have been brought up there: if it's possible, they're even *more* devoted to the lifeless ratrace than Americans.

  6. @Anonymous:

    of course, it all depends on your definition of "alpha male". As a biologist, I happen to agree with roissy that the only objective measure of alpha status is how many women want to have sex with a guy.

    If you accept that premise, all these gay-looking (and sounding) PUA's and Japanese hosts are far more alpha than the most successful business men.

    The fact that gangsters and rock stars will always outdo even the most accomplished ladies man does not take from that. Alpha status, as any social status, is relative.

    Also, from the little I learned from my various trips to Tokyo is that Japanese girls are dying to get married by Western men. They are very proud if they achieve that feat, not despite but because of what is going on in places like Roppongi. I heard several Japanese guys complain about that fact. Some went as far to say that the increase in non-Japanese (mail order) brides is a direct result of that.

  7. True Japanese girls love military and American businessmen. They want to marry foreign since they want to live abroad and travel. They believe that life outside is a fairy tail and full of glamor thanks to brainwashing by TV and Hollywood movies.

    All women operate the same way though... girls will have fun with bad boys then settle with Poindexter.

    Psh Roppongi is for amateurs... I bet you were surrounded by underage teenagers. Next time try partying in Ginza, Shinjuku, Shibuya or if your really alpha "Kabukicho" which is the best red light district and yakuza hangout in Tokyo. It def has the hottest chicks... you won't find any betas there.

  8. Anon:

    Japanese girls really let loose with a "gaijin" since they won't feel guilty afterwards.

    Not too different than western women choosing the lower quality men over the higher quality (to whom they are more attracted in this case), because the lower quality man "cannot use" them.

    Of course, then expecting the rejected quality man to date/commit to/marry them, is another issue.

    I have many times heard the phrase:

    "He is too - insert attractive quality here - to just fuck."

  9. Also Japan has the lowest rate of sex per year. Since no one is getting any people turn to weird fetishes as they get bored from normal porn. Funny thing is I actually worked as a fake boyfriend or escort to women who actually paid for the date and used me afterwards for sex. A lot of hosts to get paid for sex. I guess it is pretty alpha to get paid to drink, flirt and fuck.

  10. @ Anonymous

    "Psh Roppongi is for amateurs... I bet you were surrounded by underage teenagers"

    Hah! True story. The last time I was in Roppongi (about a year and a half ago, when I was 21), they were actually carding because half of my old school's middle school was clubbing (FYI, when I was in high school/middle school, I was in Ropps all the time).

    I guarantee you, you meet no real Japanese girls in Roppongi. Not only are you surrounded by underage teens, you're surrounded by international-school-brat underage teens.

    Shinjuku is a good gateway into the real Japanese underworld.

    @ Glowing Face Man

    "I love Japan as a visitor but I'd hate to have been brought up there"

    Don't be hatin.

    18 years, and it was frickin' sweet.

  11. LILGRL

    Oh ic... well I know this because I bounced for some of the clubs. You might remember LEX, which isn't on main street. Hmmm 18 years you must have attended one of the international schools if you can write English this well. St. Maur, NIS, YIS or ASIJ? Agreed Shinjuku, Ginza and Kabukichou is a class on its own. Roppongi is a huge ripoff you can easily spend 400 bucks at a strip club in one hour.

  12. The more things seem different, the more they're exactly the same. "[Pop singer/actress Sakai's husband] Takaso, a self-proclaimed professional surfer, was arrested after a police officer found a plastic bag containing stimulants in his underwear." All the men in Japan and she marries a "self-proclaimed professional surfer"? Sadly, "the same simple biological rules guide all human behavior."

  13. @ Anonymous

    Of course, Lex is where we'd start the night. It was mostly a St. Mary's/Seisen haven, though, my crowd was over at Feria and/or the Gas by Lex. (i.e. not Gas w/club 99). I went to ASIJ...I'm American, through and through. And...um...St. Maur? Really? YIS? NIS? NIS only goes up to 9th grade, YIS is in Yokohama, I stopped seeing St. Maur when we stopped playing them in volleyball circa 7th grade.

    In Roppongi you'll mostly find ASIJ, St. Mary's, Seisen, Sacred Heart, CAJ, and some Kinnick/Yokota/Zama kids from the bases.

    LEX was a hole, for the most part, and we only dropped by because St. Mary's (all boys school) hung out there, celebs in town would usually drop by, and oh, yeah, we got in for free. And now it's "New Lex Edo," WTF is up with that.

    "Roppongi is a huge ripoff..."

    Oh yeah, definitely. In fact, I think I'd only go to Roppongi if I were an international high school student with friends in the area.

  14. *Just a note -- the Gaspanic I was talking about (by Lex) is not the one on Roppongi-dori...not sure when you were first in Tokyo, but I'm talking about the one down the road from TGIF -- it closed in my senior year of HS (05), so you may not know of it.

  15. Gaspanic has changed a lot. They screwed in tables and chairs where the dance floor used to be and now close around midnight.

    Roppongi was a fascinating place with all the street hookers, tourists and African immigrant pimps mingling on the street. But over the past two years things have gone from bad to worse. The female population now is almost exclusively in the sex trade and the tourists get drugged drinks in order to get easy access to wallets and credit cards.

    Anyways, I have been mostly to Shibuya and Shinjuku when in Tokyo, and the above observations are largely based on what I saw in those areas: キャッチ.

  16. Wow LILGRL... I gotta come clean. I actually graduated from NIS before moving to the states. Yeah you know how it works usually the kids from NIS transfer to ASIJ either 8th grade or when they graduate.

    LEX... yeah they renovated that shit. The new owner is pretty sick, I actually partied with the old man when he stopped by to show off his new red porsche or was it BMW. Not really sure... I was under the influence of a lot of drugs. :P

    True I still stop by Roppongi just to party with friends from ASIJ, chill at a shisha bar and see my strippers for a private... dance.

    There was three Gaspanics? I know there was one near the park and the one next to 911. Both were pretty shitty.

    You must know a bunch of ppl I know. :D

  17. @lilgrl: didn't mean to come off as hating. I guess what I should've said was "I'm glad I wasn't brought up there as a typical Japanese person". Of course being an American growing up in the land of the rising sun would be freakin awesome!

  18. Interestingly enough, there are also female hosts who are paid to dress and act like men. Real Alpha men, not girlish ones. They even impose deep voices. Dissecting Japanese sexuality is confusing. Sexual restraint is prevalent in the Mid-East too, but interestingly enough none of the same perversions.

  19. Who cares? Japanese sexuality has been perverted to the point of anime porn. It isn't surprising since everyone isn't getting laid. Japan has the lowest number of sex per year, most women will only start getting physical after a few months or when they get married. Which is very annoying. Europe and America is way better none of that emotional connection bullshit.

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