Friday, April 1, 2011

I Hate The New York Times With Every Bone In My Body


These fucking people! Everything is fucking twee! Everything is a fucking lifestyle choice. God!

For the record, I compose all my long pieces on a typewriter. If I feel like editing them or sharing them online, I scan or retype them in digital format.

The third most-emailed article on the NYTimes website, as of March 31. Just look at that URL: Backslash FASHION backslash TYPEWRITER.

And I quote:

“I’m in love with all of them,” said Louis Smith, 28, a lanky drummer from Williamsburg. Five minutes later, he had bought a dark blue 1968 Smith Corona Galaxie II for $150. “It’s about permanence, not being able to hit delete,” he explained. “You have to have some conviction in your thoughts. And that’s my whole philosophy of typewriters.”

These people have NO FUCKING SOULS.

Die die die. Die in hell. Choke on your twee fucking "lifestyle choices."



  1. hipsters. the scourge of our modernity.

  2. Ha ha ha. I see the awesome amazing guy who runs has a little post where he picks out the same quote that I did:

    Misery loves company.

  3. hmmm... there MUST be software out there that will make the keys clink when you type, stick on occasion, mangle the "ribbon" and ding at the end of the line, (I was so good at ignoring that one--------------------------oops!) and then, render the "delete key" unusable.

    Conviction in thoughts? haha! what a moron!!!

    I hate typewrites. The mere sight of one to this day, provokes immense anxiety. Unfortunately because of my human status, I made a lot mistakes-- and the worst ones always seemed to be unrecoverable ones at the very end of the page-- whereby I was forced to start anew, only to find out that my ribbon had run out of ink. right?

    Computers opened up my entire world and believe you me, I WAS a Luddite, for years, or so my husband would tell me... but not anymore... Nosiree, now, I type with the best of 'em and if I make a mistake, I just fix it and move on... Life is complicated and stressful as it is. Isn't it? Wait until drummerdude has kids of his own (or maybe hips don't reproduce?) and they turn out to be as retarded (as mine are-- but I love my little retards, to bits!) and he has to send out email after email after email to get them the services that they require to function--period. Then, I would love to hear what he has to say. asshole, indeed!!!

  4. Lexie,

    That's a complex comment.

    I actually love typewriters for the same reasons the hipsters do. It's a subtle and ultimately indefensible thing that I consider my own use of typewriters "good" and the hipsters use (or purchase, at least) "bad".

    I love computers and the internet. I also compose way better (faster and more thoughtfully) on a typewriter. The medium can absolutely influence the substance. A violinist can often play better in beautiful old, deserted brick building than he can in the middle of an airport terminal. That's the way it goes.

    It's the fucking pretentious poses these people strike that drive me insane. One wonders what their lives would be like if they were stranded on a desert island with no one to observe their preciousness. I'd be worried and scared and depressed as hell if I was stranded on a desert island, but I like to think that my core values wouldn't change.But when your core values depend on other people observing you doing what you do, then the absence of an audience can mean a total loss of self. That's what is so disgusting about these hipsters. That's why I say they have no soul.

  5. Ahhh... then we are talking about narcissists and yeah, they are the most infuriating people ever, whether they be hipster and just an ego-maniacal idiot.

    I still hate typewriters though and I can't write better on one; I can't write on one---AT ALL! :)

  6. oops, made a mistake. ;)... Meant to say "or" not "and" before the "just an ego..."

    ADD people, def need computers to write on! :)))

  7. Ha ha ha... Kissing Suzy Kolber gets in on the fun:

    The comments are awesome.


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